Sunday, October 10, 2010

The Behavior of a Gulf/Arab Man (An Explanation)

The analysis or classification of men in the Gulf according to the novel "Girls of Riyadh"....

Category 1:  Strength of Personality

1st Main Group:  The Strong 
Shows a lot of motivation for economic self- improvement. These men watch the examples of success they see around them and seize their opportunity to benefit.
Group A - The logical type who respects the views of everyone he encounters even when he has a different point of view.
Group B - The man who has to have his own way and doesn’t care about the views of others.
2nd Main Group:  The Weak
Led-by-the-nose types lack initiative and only get off their butts when their family or their entire environment gets an upward kick.
Group A -  The person whose family can easily bend him one way or the other. This man is incapable of acting independently because “Without his family he isn’t worth a penny.”
Group B - The person who is easily swayed by his friends and can’t stop sway-ing. This case is even worse than the first one because this man is convinced that his family is against him and only trusts his friends, who, in general, are likely to be in even worse shape than he is.

Category 2:   Self Confidence

1st Main Group:  The Secure
Group A - The sensible type. Men belonging to this group are at peace with themselves, displaying a clear degree of confidence that makes everyone respect them and even hold them in awe. But at the same time, they maintain the love and affection of others due to their modesty and genuine accomplishment.
Group B - The Overconfident. This includes people who really don't have anything to be proud of. They have an excess of self-confidence, though they lack any reason for it; no great achievements or outstanding personality or even appealing looks. This type is abominable and, unfortunately, more common than the first one.
Group A and B together are less common than the 2nd main group.
2nd Main Group:  The Insecure
Group A - Those who claim to be secure. They affect a self-confident pose that isn't matched by any sincere belief on their part. They take every word said to them with extraordinary sensitivity and reply with great aggressiveness, shielding their failures with their loud personalities. They make mountains out of molehills, or, as we say, "a dome out of a seed."
Group B - Those who are really insecure. Men in this group don't act or claim to be something they're not. It's apparent from the first that they are pitiful and they make you feel sorry for them. Sometimes they have an obvious physical problem that lowers their self-esteem, like obesity, short height or even a big nose. Or it could be a social problem like poverty or even a mental one like stupidity. Or sometimes it could be a hidden problem that no one else is aware of, like a broken heart from a lost love that never healed.

Category 3:  Religious Types Before and After Marriage

1st Main Group:  The Extremely Religious Type
Group A - He was once wild but he turns religious.
Group B - He fears wildness so he becomes religious.
Both fear they will degenerate morally after marriage, so they often end up in polygamous marriages, preferring their wives to be at least as zealous as they are.
2nd Main Group: The Moderate Type
Group A - A strictly religious man who differs from the first group in the way he treats women: tenderly and without interference. This type can marry a relatively liberal woman as long as he is confident of her love and certain of her morals.
Group B - The seculars. This man believes that Islam is built on five and no more than five basic and compulsory beliefs. He only attends the assigned five prayers and fasts only during Ramadan. After he has gone on the Pilgrimage to Mecca, he feels he has done his part, as long as he has also adhered to the declaration of the faith and given alms to the poor. This kind of man does not marry a woman unless she is on the same level of liberation as he is.  He wouldn't  marry someone who wears hijab, for example, and would insist that his wife be pretty, open- minded and stylish so that he could proudly show her off in front of his friends, who share his point of view.
3rd Main Group:  The Wild or Escapee Type
Group A - Gradual escapee. Someone in this group may have grown up in a very strict religious atmosphere and "escaped" in a religious and moral sense. His escape is a gradual one, happening whenever he gets a chance to be away from the authority of his community. This type might pretend to belong to the first group to prevent any social embarrassment.
Group B - Liberal upbringing. This type has been brought up in an extremely liberal home to the point of atheism in his religious beliefs and the absence of any kind of bulwark against "bad behavior." And as we all say in these parts: "He who grows up doing something, grows old doing it." The problem you find in this type of man is pathological suspicion. Unfortunately, and due to his experiences with some cheap girls, he believes that every girl is guilty until proven innocent. This is why a man in the "wild" category always prefers to marry an inexperienced girl; she will always view things from his corrupted point of view. Sometimes a man of this type marries a girl who is a flirt but knows how to play the game. She knows perfectly well what her husband is really like and she knows how to manipulate and pretend so that her actions won’t end up being misinterpreted.

Does the above explain the personality type of your Arab man? Choose the behavior you like and tell me why...